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Writer's pictureJoshua Kline

We're at war over the moon


The United States is on the brink of war with China... on the moon. Okay, war is an exaggeration, but we are in a legitimate space race right now. NASA Chief Bill Nelson, who seems like a reliable source, did a sit-down interview with Politico. According to Nelson, if China makes it to the moon's surface before the U.S., they could claim it as a territory.


It would be heartbreaking to lose the moon. The moon provides us with so many great things. I mean, if we lose the moon, say goodbye to surfing waves off the coast of Malibu, the one hit wonder Walk the Moon, and every show/movie about Werewolves. I don't know about you but life without Teen Wolf is a lot worse.


Sure this starts as a race, but let's be real, do you think whoever loses the race is going to be like, "Oh, fair play, you get the moon." No! At this point, we can only imagine what a moon war would look like, but we know it can't be good... we've played enough video games to know that.


What makes me frustrated, though, is that we got there first and are still in jeopardy of losing it. We had dibs. I thought dibs was universally respected in 2023 but I guess not.


All we can do at this point is hope that Elon Musk is taking this more seriously than he did Twitter Blue the first time around.


The moon is for everyone; let's keep it that way. #FreetheMoon




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